maybe they’ll deliver

I used to really like going to the grocery store. I’ve never been good at it. I would always end up at home having spent money but not having purchased anything that goes with anything else for a proper meal. But that was O.K. I liked wandering around and looking at all the food and trying new things.

Why now, do I feel super anxious and like I am going to cry in all of the aisles? Why does the vegetable section especially make me want to panic? How did I manage to race through the place and end up with sixty dollars worth of snacks? I am already looking forward to Thanksgiving for so many deadline related reasons, but also for a real meal.

I was going to write “it’s okay, I don’t miss food,” but no one would get that joke except Sebastian. And he’s not listening.


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